10 important rules when spending the holidays with a newborn

https://www.mother.ly/child/10-rules-when-spending-the-holidays-with-a-newborn

The holidays are almost here. The next months will be filled with twinkling lights, delicious food and the gathering of friends and family. This is a joyous time, but it can be a stressful one, too. If someone in your life has recently become a parent, they likely have a few extra concerns on their minds. From keeping the baby healthy to figuring out their new normal, they have a lot going on.

I know you love them and want the absolute best for them and the baby. It’s just that sometimes when there’s a new baby, it’s hard to remember what we should or shouldn’t do; because #allthesnuggles

(Click link at top to read the post on mother.ly)

SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT, SELF SOOTHING AND ‘GOOD’ BABIES: WHY WE NEED TO STOP SETTING MOTHERS UP TO FAIL

https://raisedgood.com/sleep-through-night-self-soothing-good-babies-stop-setting-mothers-to-fail/

“Is he sleeping through the night?” asks a stranger.

“She’s too clingy. You really need to stop picking her up.” says a friend.

“Is she a good baby?” asks a woman at the park.

“He should be self-soothing by now. Consolidated sleep is critical for healthy brain development.” proclaims a sleep trainer.

“You’re creating a rod for your own back.” exclaims a grandmother.

“I hope you’re putting her down drowsy but awake.” advises a mother at a meetup.

“Feed, play sleep! Feed, play, sleep!” chants a daycare worker.

“You’re not nursing him to sleep are you? That’s a bad sleep association. How do you expect him to learn to fall asleep on his own?” questions a health nurse.

“Oh, he’s just manipulating you, dear. He’s got you wrapped around his tiny eight-week-old little finger.” says a mother-in-law.

“If you don’t put your three-day-old baby down to sleep in a crib on his own you’re risking suffocation and death. It is the only way babies are safe from SIDS.” states a pediatrician.

These are the loud lies of infant sleep that our culture repeats from one generation of new mothers to the next, as if on autopilot.

Without questioning the roots or validity of these statements.

Without an understanding of the biological needs of babies.

Without knowledge of what normal infant sleep looks like.

Without an appreciation for how most cultures around the world care for their babies (and why).

These mistruths are dangerous, not only because they’re false, but because they’re full of unrealistic expectations that set a new mother up to feel like she’s failing. To doubt her own abilities. To worry that there may be something wrong with her or her baby.

(click link at top to read blog in entirety)

DEAR TODDLER, I’M SORRY ABOUT THE NEW BABY

http://www.beautythroughimperfection.com/dear-toddler-im-sorry-about-the-new-baby/

Sweet. (Click link above to read the whole post on beautythroughimperfection.com)

Dear Toddler,

I’m sorry about the New Baby.

I’m sorry that since he’s been here, things have been totally different for you and for us.

I’m sorry for those days/weeks/months where Mommy wasn’t quite herself because if you only knew what my body went through to give birth to that New Baby…

No, Please Don’t Visit My Newborn

http://www.mothering.com/articles/please-dont-visit-newborn/

“My husband’s grandmother left a message saying she was coming over. Right. Now.

I’d been putting her visit off. I wanted the first week with our newborn to be a closed circle made up only of new mother, new father, and new baby. Benjamin was a wonder to us with eyes that hinted (I swear) of ancient wisdom. This time was our initiation into family life. It felt sacred to me in the way that life-changing experiences can. I didn’t want it muddied with polite conversation or awful clichés like “you look great.” (click link to read entire post)

– See more at: http://www.mothering.com/articles/please-dont-visit-newborn/#sthash.HRLBZKhT.dpuf